How to heal your inner child with the inner bonding process coined by Dr Margaret Paul

Inner bonding is a powerful six-step self-healing process that offers a road map for learning to love yourself. Learning and practising these six steps will gradually result in loving yourself rather than continuing to abandon yourself.
So let’s take a look at the six steps of healing yourself through Inner Bonding:


Step One- Be willing to feel pain and take responsibility for your feelings.
All feelings are informational, letting us know whether we’re loving ourselves or abandoning ourselves, or if others are being loving or controlling.
The first step in healing yourself is accepting the way you feel, as in moving towards your emotions and feelings, rather than moving away from them. When you embrace how you’re feeling at any given time, you can process them, learn the lessons and move forward in a positive and healthy way.

Step Two- Move into the intent to learn.
In inner bonding, there are only two possible intentions in any given moment:

To protect against pain, avoiding responsibility for it, through various forms of addictive and controlling behaviour.
To learn about what you’re doing or thinking that may be causing your pain — or what may be happening between you and another person or situation — so that you can move into taking loving action in your own behalf.

Step Three- Learn about your false beliefs:
Step three is a deep and compassionate process of exploration — of learning about your beliefs and behaviour, and about what is happening with a person or situation that may be causing your pain. Ask your feeling self — your inner child — “What am I thinking or doing that’s causing the painful feelings of anxiety, depression, guilt, shame, jealousy, anger, loneliness or emptiness?” Allow the answer to come from inside — from your feelings.

Step Four- Dialogue with your higher self: It isn’t as hard to connect with your higher guidance as you may think. The key is to be open to learning about loving yourself. The answers may come immediately or over time. They may come in words or images or in dreams. When your heart is open to learning, the answers will come.

Step Five- Take the loving action learned in step four: You’ve opened up to your pain, moved into learning, started a dialogue with your feelings, and tapped into your spiritual guidance. In step five, you take the loving action that, over time, heals the shame, anxiety and depression that have been the result of your self-abandonment.

Step Six- Evaluate your action: Once you take the loving action, you check in to see if your pain, anger and shame are getting healed. If not, you go back through the steps until you discover the truth and loving actions that bring you peace, joy, and a deep sense of intrinsic worth.

We started our inner bonding by reading the inner bonding book , it explains in detail what inner bonding is all about and how it can help you change your life for ever.

Learn More

We read becoming a loving adult to your inner child first and then we moved onto the course truly madly deeply in love, inner bonding is not a quick fix it is a process and life long journey of self discovery.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.